Tuesday, March 6, 2012

I admit.....

today is one of those weak days when I am just BLAH!!! I just want to lay in bed with a bag of Reese's Peanut Butter Cups and put in some chick flic and have the world leave me alone. That is just how I feel. There, I said it.

I have a gazillion things TO DO and a gazillion THINGS I WANT TO DO. So, I just don't do anything:-) smart right? HAHAHA nope.

Today's Highlights: got to take a 28 week pregnant momma to the dr (she lives 40min one way) and then take her to a few different places to get some errands done. She is actually 11 months OLDER THAN ME! She had her 1st grade daughter with her who was full of questions: "Ai-Yi (Chinese for "auntie" which is what all women are called by little kids here)..... you look American? Ai-Yi, do all Americans kill people cause that is what I saw on TV? Ai-Yi, why are your eyes blue and mine black? Ai-Yi do you have any candy? Yup, if she was not SOOOOOOOO cute, I would have left her somewhere! LOL! Her mom chatted with us on the way home. You could tell she was happy to have someone just to talk to, what woman/momma doesn't! Then when we got to her house, we suprised her by opening up our trunk and taking out food from our food bank for her. She was trying to hold back the tears and excitement. We were able to give her daughter writing utensils, markers, book bag and such, things that momma just can't afford. This was the awesome part of my day.

Today's Sad moment: an 18yr  old who called our hotline a few days ago, she never showed up and I texted her thinking she was at school. She called me to say she was at the dr's with her mom, she was prepping for her abortion in 30min. That kinda stopped me in my tracks. I asked if I could come to the clinic and talk with her and her mom. No, that wouldn't be a good idea. She was saying she was young and all the things I have heard before and I am sure she heard her mom say.  But, they had their minds made up. My heart ached. Did she call me back as a last hope? someone to come help her? should I have been more forceful? So many things have gone thru my mind today about this. Just dampens the day.

Today's What I Can't Control : we have a family desperately waiting to pick up their child. Unfortunately AIT has suddenly said they want to have proof the birth father doesn't want baby. WELL, they make it sound so stinkin' easy! The plan I had for getting the proof today didn't work out and someone else said they were going to help and do it. So all afternoon I have been on edge waiting to hear SOMETHING but have heard NOTHING. I know God is teaching me something, just wish I knew. I wish I had a perfect answer for the family who is agnozing over this, the last bit of information so they can come and pick up their son. I really don't like being in control.

So, this is what my day has been like. The past few days I have had a migraine, totally knocking me off my regular schedule. I gotta bounce back. Satan is not gonna get me down, though he is tryin' his best. I know that I have a promise that MY GOD NEVER CHANGES and that HE is with me through everything, HE will never leave me nor forsake me. MY GOD REIGNS!!

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

Oh, Deana, I'm so sorry you have had such a hard day. But, no doubt, God has been Glorified through your efforts. Someone was sharing the word of a Casting Crowns song today, "I will praise you in this storm" and I thought that some storms last hours, some days, and some longer. I pray today that the Lord will refresh and strengthen you. Thankfully, when we aren't in control HE is! Love and blessings to you, friend.
Teresa

Tish said...

oh, man...i know that feeling when a young woman calls you and tells you she decided to abort...all of your previous conversations flash through your mind and you wonder if you could have said something...anything...differently to change her mind. all i could do was continue to show her the love and grace of Christ afterwards. my heart goes out to you, deana!

JEff said...

Deana, we love you and the work that you all do. We thank you for advocating for us and allowing us to be a part of the family. We can't wait to be reunited with you all again next week. Praising God in faith of his good will!